Soft pretzel disdain

Dude-ism #104

A couple weekends ago, my parents and I decided to get Wawa hoagies for dinner. Dude isn’t a hoagie fan, but I didn’t want to not get him anything when I went to pick up our food. I spotted the soft pretzels on the checkout counter and thought I would be the best sister ever and get him one.

When he finished eating his ravioli, I asked him if he wanted the soft pretzel.

“Not yet,” Dude responded.

He always says that, I thought. Time to rephrase.

“Dude,” I began. “If I put a soft pretzel in front of you, would you eat it?”

“NOOOOOOOOPE,” stated Dude, with inflection. He kind of scooped his voice down and brought it back up. The way the rest of the family does on occasion. But a way he has never done before.

I stared in amused disbelief. Dad, who had just taken a sip of beer, struggled to keep it from coming out his nose as he snorted in laughter.

Dude never says “nope.” It’s always “not yet,” or “no.” But mainly, “not yet.”

I guess he really did not want that pretzel.


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